Fuuuuuckkkkkk!!!!!!!!

I just want to stand and scream fuck at the top of my lungs. I just want to let it all out.

Therapy was rough today. I spoke of the pain from the abuse of when I was a child. I described in detail what happened to me. It's been a long time since I have spoken of it. I held the tears back as I told my therapist of what I endured. Yet it was not tears of sadness it was tears of anger. Anger that this happened. Anger because I did not deserve this. For fuck sake I was a kid! They stole my fucking childhood. Why did they take it all away from me? 20 years later I am fucked up still!!!!!

I wish it never happened to me. I wish I could let it go. I don't want to be haunted by these memories anymore. I want to lay my head down on my pillow and not have my dreams haunted. I don't want the anger or the hatred that burns inside me anymore.

FUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!